Life goes on with Bay Girl much as it has. She's bagging up now, and is absolutely enormous. She is not very happy with me as of late seeing as I've dewormed her and given her several of her pre-foaling vaccines, but all is usually forgiven with cookies. Other than that, I have nothing new to report, because I've done little with her.
There's been plenty going on with the Sophie deal, but I've not written about that either. Why? Probably because it gets very tiring explaining myself and my reasons to everyone who thinks I know what I want, and that this mare isn't it. I had the finances and the eye to pick out a very nice horse (the one gelding I looked at just sold to Gina Miles, and the other mare I looked at is at a barn featured in Eventing Nation just last week)... and I picked Sophie.
I also don't have the heart or strength in me to stand up to the angry hordes who will unleash their rage upon me when I mention what my eventual plans with this broodie are - specifically that, breeding - and I feel that writing about it will end up just making me feel rather bad about myself. Those of you from Eventing-A-Gogo may remember all the outraged backlash I received when I mentioned breeding Gogo, who was a far superior mare to Sophie if we are all to be honest with ourselves. As just a few examples, try here, and here, and here, and here, and me finally losing my marbles in frustration here. The comments on all of those posts hurt ya'll. They hurt. They really made me feel awful about myself, which is such a crying shame... I don't know any of these people in real life, why would their opinions make me feel like such a terrible person? Apparently, I am not made of as tough of stuff as I thought.
Which leads me back to Sophie. Yes, she is coming home with me. No, she is not here yet. No, I'm not sure what she'll be capable of in the longterm. Yes, it is assuredly worth it to see. And even though it almost pains me to put it out there in public, yes, I have plans to breed her at some point in the future. There, I said it. Tear away, naysayers. Hurt me to the core, I am ready.
This, of course, has led me to this problem: do I or do I not start a new blog for Sophie? Do I write publicly about my endeavors with her, or not?
Let's face it. We don't have the same sort of goals and message going that Gogo and I had. We probably never will. It will probably never be interesting to read. It will probably not have much of a point. I will probably get continual crap for my decisions. So do I bother putting it all out in public?
I'm undecided as of yet. What do you think? And be honest.
Personally, I'd love to hear about your adventures with Sophie! Even if the adventures aren't as interesting as Gogo's were, Sophie herself is bound to be an interesting and fun horse!
ReplyDeleteI think you should do what you want. I would be very pleased to read a Sophie blog, so I hope that you'll write one. But life is too short to be that crushed by what some strangers on the internet have to say, so if that's not a thing you can shake off, I think that's fair.
ReplyDeletePlease write! I have always loved your blogs and will enjoy reading about Sophie, too. I think it is really neat that you two found each other. She is a lucky mare! I hope you do post when you start stallion shopping, so that I can live through you. I have a gelding so ... well, you know. I won't be stallion shopping in the near future.
ReplyDeletePlease keep writing! I love that you found each other and no matter where it leads I will love hearing about your adventures together!
ReplyDeletePlease keep writing! I'm sure life with Sophie will be very interesting and I'm very curious to learn more about the whole breeding process. And the baby will most certainly provide plenty of material! All the best to you and Spohie! I can't wait to see pics of her once she's been put into work. You're going to have so much fun with her and that's all that really matters in the end.
ReplyDeleteI don't feel I have much to add, but that I enjoy your writing and your knowledge. I think your background of breeding education makes you more qualified to make breeding decisions than the uninformed internet mob.
ReplyDeleteYou have to remember that the horse overpopulation is not helped along by someone breeding a quality animal. There is always a market and a use for quality, and more so if you are creating the animal for yourself.
It's easy for people hiding behind a pseudonym to think it's okay to be incredibly rude and insensitive. It's okay for you to say "to hell with THAT person, I'm going to do what I think is right". So you go out and do just that.
Good luck, and I hope to be able to keep reading you in the future.
You could enable comment moderation and promise not to publish hurtful comments. I guess you would still have to read them, but they might stop when the authors did not get published again and again.
ReplyDeleteYou do not have to be headed for Rolex to have an interesting horse blog. I would happy just reading about riding, hoof trimming, and your new girl, Sophie.
You're an interesting writer--let's face it: Bay Girl is cute and endearing and not really gong anywhere.
ReplyDeleteAs for breeding, I say go with it. I may be a ridiculous OTTB loving person, but that doesn't mean I have a problem with people who breed their own horses. Heck, that's where my mare came from.
I know any foal you decide to bring into this world will be extremely well cared for and loved. You went above and beyond for Gogo, and any horse would be lucky to have you as an owner. Sophie will be very happy.
ReplyDeletePlease write about Sophie. :) I really enjoy your posts and think you are a wonderful writer. I would love to hear about your adventures with her and about hoofcare (one of my favorite topics on Eventing-A-Gogo). :)
Andrea,
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing horsewoman, no matter what anyone says. You need to do what you need to do at this point in your life and if that means having a horse simply as a friend, that's more valuable than the athleticism, talent, or cost. Sometimes that's what we need to get our feet back under ourselves. That friend. No pressure for success. No demands. No goals to drive the two of you through the day. Just enjoy each other. Love you!
Of course you should do what make you happy :) I enjoy reading your posts and hearing about your exploits with any of the horses you have blogged about and will continue to do so if you keep writing. It's tough to ignore those arm chair experts but man if they have enough time to make assumptions and critique the small slice of thought that you publish, and giving unsolicited ass-vice they are stepping way over the line of appropriate and are probably not people you would spend time associating with in RL. I'll miss your blog if it goes :(
ReplyDeleteAndrea, please write about Sophie! You are one of my favorite horse bloggers, and I would be so sad not to read your stories anymore. And as for breeding her... I know you will do right by any baby you bring into this world. If you think it's right, go for it!
ReplyDeleteIt's your horse and you can do what you want with her. Just curious, when is he coming home? And are you planning on breeding her this season or the next? Please keep writing and I love the blog. You clearly have a strong connection with this horse, and even if she produces the ugliest baby in the world (not that she could), you would still love her and provide a home for that baby. Is she the nicest mare in the world? No. But she, in my opinion, is certainly nice enough to breed. Plus, you have the advantage of picking out a really kickass stallion to breed her to. Hell, I don't even have a mar and I like to stare at stallions all day. I love to look at the knabstruppers: http://www.knabstruppers4usa.com/stallions_at_stud.php
ReplyDeleteWhich leads to another curious question- what breeds were you looking at? Some type of Warmblood, I assume. If you breed her to a Knabstrupper and she passes inspection, her baby could be registered. Just a thought since you've mentioned that you like funky colored horses.
Please keep blogging! I would love to see a Sophie baby!
I personally like reading your blogs because of your hoof knowledge, breeding knowledge, and horse knowledge. Not to mention you write in such a witty and endearing manner that I cannot help but read. I kind of don't like reading about people saying "Oh, we'll be going to HITS Ocala this weekend, and then we'll be on our way to the Desert Circuit the next! Busy, busy, busy!" because it takes a lot of effort for me to rejoice in their triumphs (that I am positive would not be possible without a Swiss bank account somewhere in the mix) that I never want to achieve, nor can I really be sorrowful in their "downfalls" ("We only got third in the $25,000 GP! We only got $5,000! Boo-hoo!") and I really cannot relate to them. You and Gogo were doing big things, yes, but in such a situation that I and most horse people could relate to. It was beyond refreshing. And even after those days were over, the interesting posts didn't stop.
ReplyDeleteAs for Sofie: I think she is a NICE mare, and for her to be in as good of shape as she is now with little to no maintenance screams good genetics to me. Sure, there are fancier horses out there, but can all of them stand the rigors of being over 10? Not always. As for overpopulation: it is not breeding that is the problem, it is the breeding of poor quality horses that are unusable, among many other things. Not all good horses have to come from a fancy breeding program, and not all good horses have to be of Olympic quality (and just because it came from a fancy uterus impregnated by fancy sperm doesn't mean it's going to be fancy enough to head to anything big anytime soon!)
Greta came from a mare very much like your Sofie, just a nice QH instead of a nice WB. Owner had this mare for a long time, loved her, bred her to a nice WB stud, and the end result has turned out pretty well! She has lovely gaits and conformation and personality and great soundness even at age 14 (she is turning around from her little blip right now at such an astounding rate that it amazes the vet!) Good genetics if you ask me! Could she go to the top? No. Do I want to breed her? Yes. Will I rely on the opinions of psuedonym bloggers? No... that doesn't sound very smart. I have vets and professional opinions for that.
Go with the Sofie blog... and the Sofie baby. If you go with the Windfall idea you talked about so many years ago, I think that coupled with your horse skillz would make for a damn fine baby.
I do like the monitoring comments idea. It makes sense, and it seems to work for others.
And another thing for the Sofie-non-believers: http://fuglyblog.com/2011/11/21/in-defense-of-the-backyard-breeder/
True story bro.
I would love it if you continue writing and I think breeding Sophie is a great idea. You have talked about it for so long and I'm sure the baby will be lovely.
ReplyDeleteThere will always be a place for all animals who have been bred with thought and care. People need to understand it's not BREEDING that's bad, it's CARELESS breeding. I know there's a problem with overpopulation, but someone who is looking to breed and keep the foal isn't contributing to it.
ReplyDeleteOh sure, someone will probably say "But you could save a life~." And they need to realize that rescuing isn't for everyone! There are a lot of unknowns with animals no matter what. I've been looking at rescuing some rats, because I miss my boys terribly... then I keep thinking back to the one that was so horribly bred he was completely blind and had a the world's shittiest temper (and he bit HARD). He lived out his last year with a friend, when I had to move and couldn't take him, but those first 2 and a half (he didn't get the "short life" genes)... I still have scars on my hands. I couldn't do that again. And I think back to the cockatiel that I was given, and how she was mistreated for the first year of her life, so she was like a rescue. After 10 years of having her with me, I finally admitted that I wasn't the best person for her, and gave her to a lady that HAD rehabbed cockatiels before. My bird immediately turned around and had a total personality change.
Rescuing dogs isn't for everyone either. My first dog was food aggressive, and had he hot been found, he would have never been adopted. My fiance's border collie, who we lost just last month, had kidney problems so had to be on a special diet her whole life, and then turned into a magnet for various cancers (nearly dying a couple of years ago to a tumor consuming her pancreas), and we finally had to let her go after she developed a cancerous lesion on her brain and she was hurting herself daily.
I'm will probably end up "rescuing" my first horse, but the option of buying one that's "right" for me isn't out of the question. Everyone has different needs.
But if you want to breed a horse, breed that horse. To me (and others, I'm reading!), you've shown yourself to be very thoughtful of the outcomes, and into picking the right stallion for the job. I certainly would look forward to a Sophie blog, no matter what you do with her once she's home with you.
Please keep writing!! I would love hearing about Sophie, and especially a Sophie baby. I am a sucker for baby horses though ;) And you never know what interesting adventures you and Sophie will have together.
ReplyDeleteIgnore those naysayers and keep posting!
ReplyDeletePlease keep writing. Your writing is fantastic and after reading your blogs for so long I'm sure many, like me, are interested in what you're up to as well as how your horses are! I'd love to hear of your adventues with Sophie as well as the regular ol' days. I also really enjoy your writing, you have a talent for it.
ReplyDeleteAs for other peoples' opinions, well they are just that. Some will agree, some won't, and that's the case for absolutely everything in life. Somebody else cannot make you feel something, and whilst I understand of course how awful it is to read criticism of yourself or your decisions, what you do with that and make of it is in the end up to you. This for you could mean taking a teaspoon of concrete and hardening up, or perhaps looking at each comment objectively and somewhat detachedly and determining whether or not they have a point. Even if they do, at the end of the day you are an experienced career horsewoman, and whilst others may have experience and genuine advice to offer too, nobody knows or understands your situations as well as you do, and your decision - whether others agree with it or not - is still and will always be the most informed decision on the matter purely because it is based upon hours of first-hand experience in the situation, and informed by your years of training and experience and goals for the animal. Do your thing, and carry right on doing it well.
And yes, Sophie definitely needs her own dedicated blog! "The Sophie Stories", I can see it now!
Please keep writing! And it is ridiculous for trolls to make you feel bad.
ReplyDeleteI would personally LOVE to hear of your adventures with Sophie and I do hope you decide to blog about her! What truly matters in this world is what's important to YOU and as easy as it is to say (and difficult to do!), ignore those who try to rain on your parade. There's no excuse for that. If you want to breed her, you should! It would be an exciting adventure! I often fantasized of breeding Daatje to the Dutch stallion Sempatico. Boy would that be cool! But, I couldn't keep the foal at this time in my life, so I don't. But under different circumstances, you bet I would! So, please do keep writing. :) I'm dying to meet Sophie!
ReplyDeleteSigh. I hate to think that internet busybodies will make you end your blog. I have so enjoyed your thoughtful, honest, inspiring, sometimes heartbreaking, always beautifully-written entries. From an entirely selfish point of view, I sure hope you will keep writing! It might sound ridiculous, but I've been following your blog for so long, that losing it would feel like losing a friend.
ReplyDeleteI do understand how difficult it must be to deal with the naysayers - as much as you know in your heart that they are just selfish, anonymous internet trolls, it would still hurt. I know I second-guess myself all the time when it comes to decisions with my own horse, and I can't imagine having to face a blog-full of dissenting opinions... As they say, if you ask 5 horsepeople about something, you will get 10 opinions - and each will be passionately convinced that theirs is the only way! And you really shouldn't have have to go to the work of maintaining a blog just to have a bunch of strangers make you feel badly about yourself...
But for what it's worth, THIS anonymous stranger supports you completely in whatever you chose to do with Sophie. I know without a doubt that you are a responsible horsewoman who does not make decisions lightly, and I have every confidence that whatever you do will be right! And selfish though it may be, I sure hope you'll let us tag along with you in this new chapter of your life...
You know, when I decided to breed my mare, some of my friends gave me grief about it. I realize they were trying to be helpful and didn't mean any harm, but at the time it hurt my feelings. It made me feel that I was somehow not qualified to make the right decisions. Thank goodness I politely ignored their advice, because otherwise I wouldn't have my once in a lifetime horse. We are now starting to have some success at training level (eventing), and he has taught me more than all the horses I've ever ridden combined.
ReplyDeleteWe now have two more by the same stallion. My husband wanted one of his own, and I ended up with a young mare just this year. When I mentioned maybe one day breeding the mare, because obviously I like the family and work well with them, the same naysayers started to "help" me. I had to laugh and remind them of a similar conversation we had so many years ago. It turned into a productive brainstorming session after that. LOL
If you go with your heart, and use your knowledge to the best of your ability, what's the harm.... We only have one life to live, and one person to answer to, make it your own. Personally I think you should use your writing ability and share your journey, if you help even one person it seems worthwhile.
Would love to keep reading your blog, regardless of what you decide to do in the future. Good luck in your decisions!
ReplyDeleteWell, you could always transition THIS blog to fit you and Sophie. Bay Girl will be gone soon [I truly hope you two cross paths down the road] and I doubt she would mind sharing her blogspace. :)
ReplyDeleteI'd love to read about you and Sophie. She sounds like a lovely horse.
Like I said, its not up to anyone to decide. Only YOU can!
Have a good day :)
keep posting its truely your talent..... remember all those hater "read your blog" they dont know you nor do they know your story....
ReplyDeleteI hope you do create a blog for Sophie. I don't have a horse at the moment, so I have to live vicariously through blogs, and the blogosphere would definitely be poorer if you quit writing!
ReplyDeleteI would LOVE to hear of your adventures with Sophie! And I think Metro's legacy should live on. Fuck the naysayers, moderate the comments if you have to. Please keep blogging, and making your voice heard!
ReplyDelete-Cyg
First, I want you to know I have been reading your blog for a while, I have never posted before, or bothered to read the comments. FOLLOW YOUR HEART on this!! Horse are NOT about competition goals, proving ourselves to the world…. Or any of that! Once upon a time I was riding prelim, a full working student, etc etc.. and I burnt out on it. It wasn’t about the love of the horse and our special bond.. it was about training, goals, competition etc, which really, is not what the horse would choose if given such a choice.
ReplyDeleteI “dropped out” and started working with auction horses, helping back yard riders with the horses, starting babies… and just ENJOYING horses, the process of building trust and improving training without hard deadlines and pressure.
My beloved “heart horse” had broke his leg in a freak accident, and left me horseless for the first time in many years. People kept asking about what sort of competition project I would be buying. I didn’t buy a show project… I bought a weanling with unknown prospects. It was the right choice for ME. Raising her, training her, starting with all of the little things has been the most REWARDING thing I have ever done with horses. More rewarding than any ribbon that is for sure!
I am sure working with Sophie, developing her, and yes, breeding her will be a very rewarding experience, and allow you to really ENJOY your horse, and the whole process. Usually I am “anti breeding” but I am sure you will be responsible for the life you are bringing into the world. Don’t listen to the “haters”. On the internet, the displeased tend to be the loudest. The ones that quietly approve usually go unheard. I hope you do a Sophie blog.. I keep on checking back to see if you have started one yet :)
I know there's already a ton of comments on here so I won't say much... but please keep writing!! Eventing a Gogo was the first blog I ever got into. I'd love to hear your progress (as small as it may be) with Sophie or any other horse in your life!
ReplyDeleteOne more here for keeping writing about what ever you want to. I'd be interested in hearing more about the hoof trimming, and just stuff about life in Texas (or wherever).
ReplyDeleteKeep posting. Breed her. Don't doubt yourself. You're freaking amazing. =D
ReplyDeleteI'm another person who read GoGo's blog for years and now read this one. I just have to say I love your writing style and have really appreciated learning from your blogs, whether you are competing or not. I would really enjoy reading about your experiences with Sophie. So, I hope you continue writing, but also understand if you choose not to. By the way I totally understand and support the idea of breeding Sophie. I know you would take great care in producing a wonderful foal.
ReplyDeleteI'm new to your blogs but I love them! I love your honesty and openness. No matter what anyone says, it's your life and your horse(s). You have to do what is best for you. What does your heart say? I truly doubt you would jump into anything horse related without doing tons of research. I would love to read about your new adventures with Sophie. I have a blog that no one reads but I still enjoying sharing my lack of horse experience with my 2!! Good luck!!!
ReplyDeleteI have been reading your posts for four years now, which makes me fell uncomfortably like a stalker. You challenged my thinking on shoes and my horse thanks you for it. I cannot tell you want is right or wrong but I will miss your literary presence in my life if you do not keep writing. Just my 2 pennies.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with whomever said that it's not breeding that's bad, it's CARELESS breeding. I can't believe anyone would criticize you - obviously an informed, thoughtful, responsible horse owner - for wanting to have a foal out of your own mare. It's not like you're planning to hoard a herd of oops babies! Those people must belong to the school of "must pick on someone else to make myself feel better." Been running across them my entire life and don't expect them to go away!
ReplyDeleteAs far as continuing to blog - please, please do. I enjoy your writing style and even though I'm a pretty new reader, have learned much about eventing and barefoot hoof care. Not to mention gentling a half-wild brood mare! :-) I think there are many of us who are looking forward to hearing about your adventures with Sophie, even if you're just ambling down trails.
Don't let the bastards get you down!
How can you NOT have a blog about Sophie... we've all been captivated by the bizarre and coincidental she even came to be in your life... how can you just leave us hanging, at the beginning of the story? :)
ReplyDeleteSlow to reply. I think you know what I'll say - you don't have to have national championship goals to have a totally enjoyable blog. I'm never going to do anything truly noteworthy with Dixie (maybe Decade Team, one day) and I write anyway. :) Fuck the haters, they can do what they want with their own horses. If you're not going to overpopulate the US with your huge breeding operation, do what you want!
ReplyDeleteI sincerely hope you continue to blog about whatever moves you to do so. You don't realize how much what you write about touches the people who read it. You loss of Gogo occurred a couple of months before I lost my dream horse. Reading that you were grieving as well made my grief bareable because I was shown that I wasn't alone in my completely incomprehensible love for an animal. So thank you for that. I am sharing Gogo's blog with a friend of mine who put her mare down this week due to severe long term soundness issues with the hope that reading the blog will help her by knowing as I do, that we're not alone.
ReplyDeleteOn the subject of breeding, while I am typically against using mares as walking incubators, when you are breeding one well bred horse to another well bred horse with the intention of keeping the offspring, and are making educated decisions about sire & dam then that's very different than breeding some sway backed, cow hocked, flat footed, parrot mouthed fugly mare to a similar stud just because you think you can make a couple buck off of it.
Anyway, that's just my two cents worth. Best of luck for whatever you decide to do. We'll follow you along on the journey if you'll let us.
Andrea, I hate that people gave you so much crap about breeding. People need to get a life & get out of yours. I bred my mare last April. She is a very average TB that honesty had achieved nothing huge in her life. But I love her so much and she comes with such a special meaning to me that I wanted to have a piece of her one day in the way way future when se was no longer around. When I let my bloggers know I didn't get the same backlash that you did... And I honestly was prepared for it because of the backlash you got. Our story has been very interesting. My goal was born on Monday. She is premature and overcoming the dummy foal syndrome. She will likely cost me $15k in vet bills which would send most of your readers into a tizzy, I know. But I don't give a crap what anyone thinks. She is mine, momma is mine, they will likely be mine forever til the day they both die so what does it matter to anyone else? All of this to say, do it. Go for it! While I will likely never breed again and this week has been one of the hardest of my life, it has taught me so much about myself and has showed me that even when I thought i couldn't love any harder, I did. It will be so worth it when she comes home. So so so worth it. Come check us out www.theprocessoflearning.com and I'll be looking forward to reading about you and Sophie :)
ReplyDeleteI haven't read the other comments yet so I hope everyone was kind and supportive. I totally understand how remarks on the internet can hurt even though we know we shouldn't let it get to us. It does. That's just how it is.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you've done anything wrong at all. I also don't think there is anything wrong with wanting a foal out of Sophie. It's not like you're breeding to make money. You're breeding to have your own foal. And we know you'll do all the careful research and you'll take wonderful care of them.
I already saw that you made a blog for your new girl (so far behind on reading) and I'm so happy you decided to. :) I can't wait to start reading about her. Hang in there girl. Things are going to get better, I promise.